The Rant/Venting thread

[Liz]

I may be Catholic, but I do NOT approve of gays being tormented & told they're going to Hell. No real Catholic approves of that (I just wanted to clear that up because most people think all religious people think gays are evil). Anyone who mistreats you because of who you are is very wrong.

I'm glad you won't kill yourself. You just need to have faith. You'll find happiness. I know it. Things will get better. *hugs* Remember, you're in my prayers!

[Teh Squishy]

Have I told all of you just how much I LOVE YOU GUYS?!?!?!? *huggles each and every one of you* Seriously, I'd be there for all of you too.

[Liz]

And we love ya right back. *mega-hugs* We're always right here if ya need cheerin' up.

[EbonyStar]

*flies in and hugs*
Sorry. My dad was installing our home phone again and now.......that's a different story ^_^

I'm sorry, Squish. Things are gonna turn around someday, cause.......well, that's just how life treats people. You're suffering this much now, so it's gonna get better in the future. But for now *hugshugshugshugshugshugsHUGSSSSSSS*
*hugs*
Sorry. It was missing a hug ^.^

Just don't change yourself, okay? Like, ever really. Cause you're you just the way you are, and as long as you're yourself, you can't really go wrong
Man. Hallmark could have afield day with this post *hugs again*

[EbonyStar]

Double posts. We all love em

I don't have a rant. I definitely have all the material, but I can't put it into words. That's the most annoying thing ever, so there's my venting post. This is the first time in years that I've said "I need to be in my room" because it's my safe spot where I can be emotional if I want to be

I'm such a mess, and I'm not myself at all

Aand my mom just freaked out because she came home again and caught me on the computer. What the hell is wrong with her, anyway? She's supposed to be on her way to the airport right now!
She's annoying. It's not even jst because I'm in the ranting mood that I'm saying that. she really is annoying. She'll tell me to do all this stuff, and she'll talk about how defensive people get during arguments and how pointless that is, and whenever she has an argument with me, guess who gets more defensive? Yup, my dear darling mother.
Okay, so I was sick last night, but I started feeling better this morning. so I got up and walked around a bit. I came onto the computer to check some stuff and maybe write, because I was awake in bed all night and couldn't stay there any longer. She comes home, sees me out of bed, and says "You're well enough to go to school"
And next time I say I'm sick, she won't let me stay home. I don't think she understands that we don't do anything on Fridays, so it really doesn't matter that I stay home. And I haven't missed a lot of school this year at all. I think I've earned a day off, whether I'm sick or not. Which I still am, actually, I found out this morning. She doesn't seem to get that.
And if I'm not physically sick, I'm sick of her. Usually both (like now)
Oh well. At least she isn't making me go to school. I mean, she told me that as long as I'm walking around I have to clean the basement, but that's very easy and I was actually planning on doing that anyway
I win. Again. And she doesn't even know it

[Liz]

Ugh.....

Some girl from dA just yelled at me because I put a few of her Misto pics in my photobucket. She said I was terrible & she hated people that steal. I didn't use her pics for avvies or sigs or anything! I just put the pics in my photobucket because I like looking at them.

Jeez......some people are just insane over "stealing" pics. They're screencaps, for God's sake! Not works of art that took them hours. Oy...I wanted to be friends w/ her too because she's a Misto fan. But now....oy.

[Emily]

I'm angry at myself for letting myself slip into a depressed state, thus missing my English class twice. Normally I loved going ... but the past two times I was supposed to be there I couldn't drag myself from bed. I'm pretty sure that now my professor A) Hates me or B) Wonders why I'm not in class. I'm willing to bet it's A... In fact, I don't blame him for probably hating my guts. Then again, he probably doesn't care, as most professors do. It's not their problem if you're not in class... I know that some do care, which is good... but it's not like high school. I think teachers were much more approachable in high school... I can't even ask any of my professors if they'd mind writing a letter of recommendation for me. I was going to ask my English professor but now... screw it. He wouldn't do it, anyways.

I hate myself right now. I just... do. I wish I could understand why I hate myself and why I want to detach myself from everyone... but I can't. It's not like a suicidal "I want to kill myself" hate - it's just a weird, sort of discontent I am holding within me... towards myself. I feel like crying. I feel like hiding off in a corner hugging my Jack Skellington pillow...but I can't... gah... I just hope things go well on break... if something happens to my grandfather I am going to die. Seriously... I'm just going to waste into nothingness... I know it.

I hate it also when I want to leave and people think I'm a pansy. They don't understand my pain. I had to go and explain to people at the TBC why I wanted to leave... and they think I'm sort of joke "oh I'll return within the next two weeks or so" - f*ckING BULLsh*t! I am tired of trying to be something I can't be. I don't think I want to be on the forums anymore... except this one obviously because I run it... but my gosh... I think all this stress and my grandpa's is driving me insane.

[Bonejangles rox]

I was worried about one of my "friends" because she had been saying she wasn't going to eat any more. What a great time for my Health teacher to make us write a story about a teen with anorexia. I wrote the story with characters based off her, me, and another of our friends, hoping it would help the first girl see what she was trying to do to herself. It didn't quite go "according to plan..."

The second girl, who was barely in it at all, threw a FIT because I wrote her in as my friend! I have never been more insulted in my life!!!! She was like, "who in their right mind would want to be friends with you?! He's going to know I was stupid enough to even talk to you!" The first one was like, "I'm NOT going to die! I'm going to lose a ton of weight and my mom's finally going to like me! You should never have made all this crap up about me having low self esteem!" Which she does. She accused me of lying and making her out as some little wimp who can't take care of herself. AND SHE SIDED WITH THE SECOND ONE ON BEING CALLED MY FRIEND AS AN INSULT!!!! I just walked away, and now they're trying to get ME to apologize. ME! I was trying to save the first one's life, and they were insulted by being called my friend, and they think I should apologize!!!!!! If they think I'm the one at fault, they really need a reality check because I WAS DOING A GOOD THING!

[EbonyStar]

This is kinda random, kinda not. It doesn't have anything to do with people on here, so don't worry

One of my worst problems (worst problem = thing about myself that I hate the most) is that I push people away. I don't know how, I don't know why, and it took me years to realize I was actually doing it. I hurt people, I puh them away and therefore act like I don't care that I hurt them, and sometimes when I don't realize it that's even worse, because by the time I do realize it the scar's already been made and it's too late to bring it up again to try and heal it.

Yesterday is a good example. In the morning, I found out that the eighth grade was having their second Speech Night that evening. Speech Night is basically when eighth graders pick a topic and write a five minute speech about it. They were supposed to be done last December, and when half the grade hadn't finished them, the teachers kept extending the date instead of failing the kids that deserved to be failed. They were given five months to write a five-minute speech. Fair, huh?
It was ridiculous, and I found out about the second speech night the day that it was happening. Okay, like hell I'm going. It's over an hour long, and it's the eighth-graders' fault that it's this delayed. I shouldn't have to suffer for it. Not many high schoolers went, if any.

Anyway, Dan (he's an eight-and-a-half-grader.....long story. He should be in ninth grade) is this kid who I know really well, and earlier on in the year we were really good friends (which kinda rocked, cause I didn't know him before this school year, but his mom and my mom work together and their offices are right next door to each other). I feel like I've been pushing him away, though, cause.....well, just cause. Not really just cause, but I'll say that because I don't feel like going into it. That's a rant within itself.
He was walking down the hallway and passing my locker yesterday afternoon, and he said "Tara, are you going to speech night?" I figured all the eighth-graders realized how ridiculous this was, that they took forever to finish their speeches, so I kinda laughed and said "No." And he just kinda went, "Fine," and kept walking. It was really in the tone It wasn't spiteful, but it wasn't really sad or anything, but it wasn't joking, either. I mentally kicked myself because I always always always do that, and it's only afterwards that I realize how mean I sounded. You think I would've learned by now, huh?
I think the reason I've been pushing Dan away is because I didn't think he liked hanging out with me like he used to at the beginning of the year anymore, and I, being my typical self, thought it'd be pointless to try and make him laugh or whatever if he had already formed an opinion about me. Now I'm starting to think he wasn't trying to avoid me in the first place, but ever since I started thinking that, he probably has, just because I was pushing him away as a reaction. I'm a friggin idiot.
In Drama Guild we got along so well, and we laughed a lot and always ended up sitting next to each other and being in the same groups and everything. Now it kinda feels like "Oh, everyone knows Dan because he's funny and smart but still cool and he's the kid who's supposed to be in high school, so he gets along with high schoolers and middle schoolers" instead of "I'm really good friends with Dan even though I'm in high school because he likes hanging out with me, and I almost feel special in that way for once. For twice, actually. Kinda."
During the Montreal trip, he hung out with almost everyone, but it felt like he didn't hang out with me all that much. and the whole time leading up to it, he'd say "I'm going to Montreal!" like he was really excited about it (which he was) whenever he saw me in the hallway. Which was pretty much every day, because I had to get a Spanish book out of my sister's locker, which is only three or four down from his locker. During the Montreal trip, I felt like he was talking to everyone but me (which was okay, because I had a group of friends who went on the trip, too. Don't get the impression that I was miserable the whole trip, cause I had a great time. I'm really in a ranting mood right now, though). I even got the impression that he liked one of my friends, and I still kind of have that impression. She thinks he's immature and annoying, though, so whatever.

This rant has really drifted, but I guess that's good. Now I've gotten out what I have to say, even though I didn't know I had to say it.

I think the most annoying thing is that I've kept having the feeling that Dan doesn't like hanging out with me anymore, because I had that false impression in the first place. Yesterday, though, I realized that he sounded disappointed (for lack of a better word), and that led me to believe that he wasn't trying to avoid me or anything. So now I'm afraid I either ruined it since I apparently didn't already, or I will ruin it in the future.

(Random note to Rae: If you're reading this, know that this doesn't support your theory about Dan, cause it isn't like that. I can't really word anything right now, so sorry ^.^;;

Okay, I'm all ranted out. Forgive me of any typos, because my hands are so stiff that I can shake them and bones snap. I gotta get to bed, too. G'night everyone, and thanks for listening if you read this

[sephy]

An open letter to all homophobic losers:
Just because I happen to support a yaoi pairing doesn't make me a fanbrat! get your head out of the sand and stop insulting me just becazuse I have canonical evidence to support why your precious character may be interested in someone of the same gender!
*end mini-rant*

God..it's bad enough in real life when people are homophobic, but when people star flaming you because they're so convinced a character cannot be gay because "gay is bad" you just wanna murder them for the good of the gene pool.


You know, I think everyone's rants can be summed up in once sentance
"real life people suck, stick with tamagotchis"

[Teh Squishy]

I am STILL in shock.

Dear mother,

You have no idea how disappointed I am of you. No friggin' CLUE. You were the more open-minded parent, or so I thought. I guess you're just as biased as dad.

Y'all remember that e-mail I got from dear Daddy a while back? No? Well, it told me I was going down the path to hell and all that fun stuff. I never told mom, and I guess neither did he (not suprised). Well, me an' mom went clothes shopping today to celebrate me getting into my dream college, and of course I shopped the boy section. Mom kept trying to drag me to the women's section, of which I showed no interest in (honestly, the Sear's women's section is 67% PINK!! I despise pink.) She started telling me over and over, "You're not a boy. You're a girl. YOu were born a girl, so you ARE a girl." I'm used to this sort of thing, and I was TIRED of trying to explain to her what transgendered meant, so I just refused all feminine clothes she shoved at me, and eventually she stopped trying to force me. I thought that maybe she was finally starting to get it.

WRONG!!

We nabbed a pretzel at the food court after we purchased the clothes, and proceeded to talk about my "gender issues", as mom put it. Well, I told her about that e-mail, and how harrassing it had been. Then I made a big mistake: I told her that the e-mail didn't actually pertain to me, as it was for homosexuals, and I'm technically a straight male. Guess what she did?

She laughed.

HYSTERICALLY.

For a good five minutes, she just laughed in my face. She couldn't even apologize, she was laughing so hard. I felt like crying right then and there. How.....how DARE she laugh at something that's a big part of me? I still can't believe it. I have come to the conclusion that I've been quiet about this for too long, and have endured enough of their bullcrap. I know now that they'll never accept me for who I am on the inside, and now I realize that I just don't care.

[Moonlight]

Squishy, I'm so sorry that your parents can't accept the way you are. I truly am.
You know you have everybody here to come to and we accept you.

I can't believe your mom would laugh at you about something like that? That's just not right, people. That's not right at all.

[sephy]

Woah Squish, I never thought i'd ever encounter someone whos mum sucked more then mine, but now I have, it's horrible that some people have such a blinkered view of the world and life.
It never means much over the internet but *gives hugs*

[Teh Squishy]

*hugs you two* thanks guys.

[Emily]

I'm sorry you have to go through this harassment, Squish. I'm sorry your parents are jerks and that I can't do anything to help you out... other than saying I'm sorry that you can't be what you want to be.

This isn't really rant, it's more of a disturbing observation:

I was trying to tell my mom about Torch Song Trilogy without giving too much away. It's one of those films that you really have to see, because it's hard explaining it without giving anything away. Well, I forgot and I was like "Oh... Matthew Broderick is really good, but it's very sad...what happens to his character." The second I said that I thought to myself "Oh snap, I shouldn't have said that." I'm not going to say what happens to him in the film (because I'm pretty sure most of you here haven't seen the movie). It's excellent though, and worth seeing. I bought it the other day, after seeing clips of it online. I'll be honest and say I wanted it because of Matthew Broderick... but the entire cast is great.

But when I was talking to my dad about this film... man... I realized that my dad really doesn't like gay people. The movie deals largely with gay relationships. Broderick's character is a gay model, and so I was saying to my dad, "I don't know if you'd really like this film, it deals with gay people... Matthew Broderick plays a gay model... but he's very good." The worst thing about my dad is that he won't come out and directly say he's uncomfortable with gay (or lesbian, transgendered, bisexual...) people. He just says things like "I don't like them sticking their agenda in my face." And when I try to correct him and say "Not all of them do that," he goes "Most of them do." That's a rather unfair judgement to make, considering my dad barely knows any gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered people. Never once have I heard him say anything of having a friend who happens to be gay or lesbian. In fact, I bet if he took the time to get to know actual gay people, he wouldn't have this "all gays want to do is push their business in my face" attitude.